- You’ve been asked by students why most of the US government would voluntarily choose to sit in the same room together once a year and broadcast this to terrorists. (“No one really watches it, anyways”)
- You can explain the ins and outs of the Congressional committee system but cannot, for the life of you, remember what the difference is between the Social Democratic Party, the Christian Democratic Party, the Christian Social Union, the Free Democratic Party, and the National Democratic Party (are those the Neo-Nazis?).
- You realize that IR/Comparativist political scientists are utterly useless at teaching American government, which honestly, every PhD graduating from an American university should be able to teach (you’ve only been learning about it your whole life, jeez).
- You are never more popular than on election night. Seriously, your phone never stops chiming with texts, calls, Facebook messages, tweets, and snaps. Where are these fuckers on your birthday?
- You think it’s crazy that IR/Comparativists that always complain Americanists only have “one case to study” somehow forgot there are 50 states in this country (see point 3 above).